Movie Review: Hangmen (1987)

SCORE

-0/5-

CREDITS

• Rob Greene: Rick Washburn.
• Lisa Edwards: Sandra Bullock.
• Dog Thompson: Dog Thomas.

REVIEW

There is no question, in my mind, that I have never enjoyed a movie less than this one. It is, however, a decent example of a bad story derived from a good plot. The plot, while unoriginal, had potential: a teenager, being pursued by a splinter group within the CIA because of information he possesses that is damaging to them, must call upon his father, "an ex-Greene Beret equipped with a rag-tag bunch of urban guerrillas and an entire arsenal of weaponry" to save him and his girlfriend (Bullock). This could have been a really entertaining action flick at least, but the story is filled with unconvincing developments and also unconvincing dialogue that is delivered, well, unconvincingly.

The violence often has no point, and is one of the earliest examples of "shaky-cam" I have ever seen. I hate shaky-cam in most cases, save Christopher Nolan's use in the new Batman franchise (it makes sense that Batman moves faster than we can truly follow), as it robs me of the enjoyment of seeing the choreography, which makes the choreography pointless. This may have been unintentional here, however, as the budget for this movie was obviously blown on props and equipment. I honestly believe that they were just using a camcorder with no stand or tripod to film the whole movie. Worse still, the action is sometimes shown in the "first person," as though the audience is playing a video game like Wolfenstein 3D (I know, that is an old school reference - think "Halo" if you prefer).

PROS: Sandra Bullock is in the movie (briefly), and I am a fan. She is quirky and original in almost everything she does. This, however, is still the exception - she can do nothing to save this movie, and she is fortunate that it did not tank her career. Perhaps this movie is a testament to her staying power, that it could not kill her career before it began?

CONS: Foul language, constant and pointless violence, and shaky-cam galore from the first person perspective = really lame movie. Worse still, Sandra Bullock's presence in a film usually means that you have found a good date movie, as she specializes in romantic comedies and female-friendly action, neither of which is the case here. This movie was the first and last time the $5 bin at Walmart has betrayed me, but I don't blame Walmart. I blame the production company for plastering Sandra Bullock's face on the cover of the DVD in spite of the fact that she only gets like 5 minutes of screen time. There is no positive content to justify the blatant profanity, vulgarity, and gore.

Final Thought: This movie was so lazy that it makes the "Blair Witch Project" seem like 5-star material. I am so angry that I actually paid $5 for it. There ought to be a law about making movies this bad. I have a rule about reviews: they are to enable readers to make an informed decision about whether to see a movie, but I do not make recommendations that you watch or refrain from watching a movie. I am breaking that rule: leave this one in the $5 bin and pick something else. Anything else.

Bottom Line: 0/5.