A wise man seeks wise counsel (no.3).

"Plans fail for lack of counsel, but with many advisers they succeed."
-Proverbs 15:22, NIV.

This verse came to me in my email devotional, and I find it to be one of the best verses in the Bible when it comes to decision-making and dealing with confusion.  Frankly, in my own life, I have often been convicted with the reality that I cannot do everything myself. 

As an example, I broke my foot last week playing tennis.  Try as I might, I couldn't take care of myself, and I needed someone to nurse-maid me until I was back on my feet again.  I am pleased to report that I am recovering quickly, and I am even able to walk normally for brief periods with the crutches (as opposed to using only my good foot).  In a short time, I will be right as rain.  In the beginning, however, my wife was a God-send.  Were it not for her, I'd have had to hire a nurse or stay in the hospital until I was able to function again.

Similarly, we should not make important decisions all alone without seeking some wise counsel first.  I will not waste time rehashing previous posts dealing with the question of when to seek help and from whom (you may find the first two posts in this series here and here; you may also find the post "No Man an Island" to be relevant, which you can find here).  Instead, I just want to focus on the wisdom of the verse quoted at the top of this post.

My wife and I have a wonderful, happy marriage.  However, we do occasionally differ, and sometimes the decision of when to seek advice is an area in which we differ.  My wife is a very private person, and she would often prefer that we make important decisions alone (after consulting the Lord, of course).  I, on the other hand, feel like the best decision is made only after consulting others whom I consider wise and knowledgeable.  Is my wife wrong to want to keep matters private?  Not at all, and some decisions really do require discretion, especially in a marriage.

All the same, the desire for privacy is often related more to one's pride than to a desire for discretion.  My advice to you, believers, is to strike a good balance.  Seek not only wise counselors, but discreet counselors.  In my view, an advisor is not a very wise person to begin with if that person does not appreciate the value of discretion.  Certainly, we know that discretion and wisdom go hand in hand (see Prov 3:21, 5:2, and 11:22).  

Remember: the Bible teaches us that our plans fail for lack of counsel (lack of wise advice), but our plans often succeed if we have many advisors.  Of course, we shouldn't be too quick to get or take the advice of a drunkard or fool, but when a knowledgeable person offers you advice, I suggest that you consider it as a gift rather than a burden.

How often do we hear advice from parents or other elders and disregard it as outdated or as another "lecture?"  Don't be a fool: if you have wise parents or elders, then listen to their advice.  It is worth more than gold.  As an example, if you are experiencing marital difficulties, don't shrug off the advice of a happily married couple and tell them it is none of their business.  Perhaps you are right that it is not their concern, but if that couple is genuinely trying to help you, then making your business their concern is a sign of friendship, not intrusion.  The secrets to happiness in their own marriage may very well be the secret to happiness in your own.  That is just an example.

Businessmen, for another example, I advise you not to hastily shirk the advice of your more successful colleagues.  Successful business models are often reproduceable, and for a successful businessman to share his insight with you, well that is invaluable.  Seize the opportunity!  Don't let pride be your downfall.

And remember, ultimately every decision that confronts you is your right and responsibility to make, but, knowing the every decision has consequences, would you not prefer your decisions to be informed decisions?  Having many advisors means understanding the facets of the situation with insights beyond/in addition to your own.  Listening to advisors is no excuse to refuse the ultimate responsibility for the decision.  You cannot sacrifice your judgment without making a choice to do just that.  Wisdom is about listening and discerning.  There is middle ground between ignoring good advice and jjust taking whatever advice comes your way.  I advise you (wisely I hope) to find that balance.  

Be blessed.